cryingmom

Kids My Door Is Always Open…Unless It’s Closed

 

My sweet darlings, momma will always be here for you.  Come to me with anything: your needs, your fears, your worries, your victories.  I love you and I live and breathe for you.  For you my offspring my door is always open.

Unless it’s closed.  If the bedroom door is closed then go the hell away!

Yes I love you, yes I will help you, and yes I will forever be here for you, but if I have stormed into the bedroom door and firmly shut it- then you must not enter.  This is my signal, my white flag, my “Momma needs a break” cue.  You have screamed, fought, whined, and argued from dusk til dawn and I have reached my breaking point.  This doesn’t mean that I have turned my back on you kids, (although in a physical sense I probably did do that as I ran for sanctuary,) it merely means: GO ASK YOUR DAD!

I have not left you all to fend for yourselves in the wilderness now.  I have left you in your capable, loving and intelligent father’s care.  Whatever is distressing you and causing you to create those little primal screams I hear, he can handle it- believe me guys!  I would not have married him if he were incapable of getting you juice, finding your barbie or changing the channel on the television.  You can trust in him, and you should.

Being everyone’s everything is an amazing gift and responsibility that you children have bestowed upon me, but it is also a heavy burden some days and occasionally that burden breaks momma’s back.  When it becomes too much to bear I have two choices here:  lose my ever loving mind in front of you all or remove myself from the insanity for ten minutes.  I need to breathe, think, decompress and make a plan.  I have to plan out how to better meet all of your needs all at once…All.Of.The.Time.  That is a hefty plan to create and execute on a 24-7 basis don’t you think guys?

This is where daddy comes in.  Your race past him to bring your bickering to my closed door.  I can hear you all fighting on the other side even though I have turned the bathroom fan on in hopes of drowning out your sounds.  Bring that drama right back downstairs to your father.  Stop knocking, stop calling my name and stop twisting the doorknob in an effort to break into my space.  Realize that this bedroom door mine as well be made of solid iron. It is not opening until I get my ten minutes of solitude.  Take your spat straight back down those stairs and allow your daddy to mediate.  Yes, he does it differently and yes you will probably get a different result.  Yes, that is okay and you will all survive these next ten mom-less minutes.

Daddy knows where the snacks are.

The man knows where the hairbrushes, toothbrushes and sippy cups can be found as well.

He can work the IPad, television, LeapPad and Wii far better than I can, that is for sure.

He enjoys playing with you, interacting with you and being there for you, if you would give him even the smallest of opportunities to prove himself you would see this.  When one door closes (like my bedroom door) another one opens…like the den door!  Go in there right now and look for your dad.

I love you all, but at this moment my bedroom door must stay closed to you so that my heart can forever remain open.

 

Love,

Your Mother in Hiding

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49 thoughts on “Kids My Door Is Always Open…Unless It’s Closed

  1. Love it! Sometimes to be a good mother, you need a break from being a mother even if that break is only 10 minutes long and just enough time to do a wee. Pen x #mg

  2. Amen to taking time for yourself! Our reset button is behind those closed doors. Which is completely invisible to the others of course. Cause if they knew, they would totally stop banging on the door asking if we were coming out yet! Right? =) #MMBC

  3. This is a very powerful post. I can’t understand what it’s like to be a mom, because I’m the dad that the kids usually run past too on their way to mom. Our marriage is a partnership so I do my best to try to keep the kids clear whenever my wife is in the room with the door closed. I guess there is a special bond between mother and child that doesn’t exist between dad and child. Either way, we have to teach our kids that it doesn’t matter which parent they run to when they need something. We have each other’s backs.

  4. I love it!!!! And I can relate to it completely… I have only one child but I can feel the frustration build up, especially because I’m home alone all day with her, so when daddy gets home I feel as if the world is whole again. Mommy can finally take a break! Good job

  5. I love this! We all need breaks sometimes and it’s good for kids to recognize that there are some boundaries. We’re trying to instill that in our family. Good for you for actually taking a time out when you need it!

  6. Oh boy do I hear ya. Except unfortunately my husband doesn’t seem to know where the juice or cups are kept, where the snacks are, where the hairbrush is or even who’s wardrobe is who’s so in that respect you should probably count yourself lucky 😉

    #bloggerclubuk

  7. Hi Kristin, I am loving this post. My sanctuary was the roof, we have a flat roofed house and it was the one place the children were not allowed, the neighbours probably thought I was barmy, but the views are nice so I probably got away with it.

    Even now my two are grown up (ish) my husband cannot understand why they always come to me. It must be a Mum homing setting that children have.

    Thank you for linking up with the #MMBC.

    xx

  8. Hehe, that’s so typical that they just follow you upstairs. You’re right though that you need a breather sometimes, even for just 10 minutes. My daughter has been testing me a lot recently – taking out her developmental frustrations on me. I had to unusually go to work on Monday this week and she was with her Dad and Grandparents. It feels like she’s appreciated me more since then! Hope your children heed your words 😉 #FamilyFun

  9. I can totally relate! I have 4 kids, and am 36 and a half weeks with my 5th. Sometimes, Mommy just needs a break! Or even to go to the bathroom alone. My kids will wonder around the house (we don’t have a big house!) calling, “Mommy! Mommy! Mommy!” while their dad is standing in the kitchen with their drink already poured, trying to offer it to them…but they can’t hear him 😀

  10. I love love love this one! I totally agree with your thoughts on being a mom. I don’t hate you cuz the door is closed, but there is another person in the house who is perfectly capable of caring for your insanely NOT EMERGENCY issue.

    I’ve actually told my kids not to bother me in my room unless the house starts on fire. Great mom, right? LOL!

    Thanks so much for posting this on the #fandayfriday link party! I’m going to share this with both of my facebook pages: I Am Zoe Watson and Mommy’s Mid-Life Quest.

  11. Thank goodness I have a wonderful husband that when we were raising children they learned to go to either of us. Yes I would need a break and close the bedroom door or go for a walk. Dad was there to always referee and could handle any situation as well as I could.

  12. I have to lock the bathroom door just to take a poop so totally relate to this. I am however, lucky that my daughter is fickle. If I say I’m busy she will go straight to her Dad! Thanks for sharing with #bestandworst x

  13. This is so true for so many mum’s. I think I may be one of the only ones with a child that asks for dad more than me. He always prefers men to women including me…but will always give me a kiss and cuddle but expect daddy to chase him round the house! #fortheloveofblog

  14. Oh I LOVE this, this is my life! My door closed mean nothing to them, actually no I think they think my door closed means WELCOME MUMMY WANTS YOU TO ENTER AND ASK ANNOYING STUFF, I am going crazy!!!! Brilliant! #mg

  15. I feel like this is a really important post for other mother’s to read. Most of the time all you see (on the internet, at least) are mom’s that are constantly smiling and happy when that’s not the reality. I’ve come to understand, though I have no kids of my own, that motherhood is one of the most incredible and rewarding experiences on earth, but it’s hard work, it’s not always butterflies and rainbows, but most people don’t choose to share that side of the story. I think it’s important for mother’s to talk about every dynamic of raising a family, so that they ones who feel like they are struggling or need some time away from their kids don’t feel like bad parents because of it.

    xo, Helene
    http://www.circleskirtsandpetticoats.wordpress.com

  16. Oh Yes! I know that feeling. But my door has no lock and so I can not hid unless I pretend to be sitting on the toilet doing #2. Please kids – give me a break! :'( Thank you so much for linking up with us on #FabFridayPost x

  17. Ahhh yes. Sometimes we need a break and the dad needs to take over. To be fair, my boyfriend and I are pretty equal in responsibilities as we both work and switch off doing the child duties at night, but we both respect when someone has a breakdown (mostly me haha)! I took the day off the other week and still brought my son to nursery, I think we all need a break sometimes, it’s therapeutic to have your own time and be yourself for a second. Thanks for sharing with #stayclassymana!

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